Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid or lose heart. —I Chron 22:13b

Today my heart hears this as a personal reminder for the present—right now at this specific time in my life, with the unexpected and seemingly imminent close of a very meaningful chapter in my story.

A chapter that God surprised me by opening 6-ish years ago now.

A chapter that he’s used to reveal to me so much more about who I really am, and the unique role he created for me in this world. I understand myself far better than I did before this chapter began. I feel more clarity of purpose and certainty of who he uniquely designed me to be, and what good stewardship of these things looks like.

Even so, I confess to feeling some sadness, confusion and even fear as this chapter comes to a close so unexpectedly.

As I consider what it might mean to be strong and courageous in the midst of this, I’m struck that true strength and courage cannot simply be willed or self-ignited inside me. It’s a byproduct of intentionally re-framing this. By choosing to focus intently on a truer, more life-giving, and eternal perspective.

I don’t get to choose what happens to me.

But I can always choose how I feel about it, what it means to me and how I respond to it. Why choose anything other than something that gives me life?

I am reminded, Lord, that all things come from you—you give, and you take away. I’m reminded that this was already written into my story from before you spoke the world into being. You authored it with perfect intentions and a larger purpose than I’m able to see—one that’s unquestionably good.

I am reminded that (i) you are sovereign, and (ii) you are good. That you do whatever you will, and ensure that all things work together for the good of those who’re called according to your purpose. All things, not just the things in life that feel good or for which I can easily connect the dots to your goodness.

In so much as I understand these things, they give me joy and peace, and at a deeper level than the sadness, confusion and fear that I also struggle with.

I embrace these truths and thank you for this harrowing turn in my story today.

While I cannot see the specific outcome of all this, I can see, looking back at such times as this in the past, that they are a precious part of the journey. Every hardship, every trauma and every tragedy in my life—all meant to turn me into the man you’ve always meant for me to be from before the foundations of the earth.

What’s more, I’m entrusted with these unexpected twists and turns—with these experiences—and asked to steward them well, in a way that honors to you. Both in how I choose to handle them today, and in how I use them for you in the days to come.

I can imagine but a glimpse of what that future might entail, and as I consider it, I’m thrilled by it. It fills me with deeper meaning and purpose as I contend with these distressing things around me.

Help me to be strong and courageous.

Lord, in the moments that I feel weak and afraid, remind me of this. Remind me of the larger story you’re writing, and though I can’t always see it, I know that I can trust it.

Remind me that this present turn of events is only a small piece of a story you’ve already masterfully crafted—an epic tale in which you’re the Hero, the battle’s already won, and I’m one of your merry men who gets to experience it with you.

In moments when I feel confusion or uncertainty, re-fix the eyes of my heart on your sovereignty and goodness.

It’s this change of focus that transforms sadness, confusion and fear into peace and even excitement.

I feel great about this.

Because if it happened, then it was meant to happen the way it did and when it did, and I am meant to make the best of it.

Thank you for this exciting piece of my journey—the adventure of discovering this thrilling story that you’ve already artfully written.

—Memento Mori, Memento Aeternum.